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Maybe You're Not A Hot Mess

There’s something about the “hot mess mom” trend that’s rubbing me the wrong way lately. I really appreciate these tweets from Cindy Brandt that name that unsettledness:

I’m grateful to folks like Glennon Doyle and Heather Armstrong for breaking ground a decade ago by blogging about motherhood in a way that was real and unedited, instead of the precious “everything’s perfect” stuff out there before. 

But I’m also, frankly, getting tired of it.
Mamas: maybe you’re NOT a hot mess. Maybe you’re doing the best you can in a (patriarchal) world that’s not set up for you to succeed. Maybe this is bigger than just frantically getting the kids out of the house dressed on time. Maybe we need huge structural change: universal childcare, single-payer healthcare, parental support, paid maternity leave, flexible work hours, aunties and uncles and grandmothers and neighbors who help raise our kids, instead of this myth that we’re all supposed to do it perfectly within the nuclear family.
Maybe instead o…

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